I went to this thing last night called a Surrendered Singles Circle, although I had no idea what it was about. It's actually based on a 2002 book that I just purchased on Amazon for about $7 including shipping. They want you sign up for a $200, 3 1/2 month biweekly seminar, but I won't because I'm cheap and I can't sit still for seminars or classes. But I'll read the book.
Basic premise? Relax, be yourself, and don't pressure yourself or your date. Some memorable lines from last night that resonate with me:
"He's on a first date, but you're in a relationship," meaning that I'm already thinking about will he make a good husband, am I attracted to him, will my friends like him, when really, that shouldn't matter. It should just be about having some fun meeting someone new.
"He didn't call because he didn't call," meaning don't get into the whys and wherefores of it all. Just move on. Don't assume it's because I suck.
It's got a bit of the 12-step idea going on, about focusing on yourself and being kind to yourself, and becoming a person you are happy with.
Afterwards I talked to the guy likely to be #22, and I really enjoyed it. I tried to just be myself more, and I felt like it worked! I relaxed and didn't censor myself quite so much, and it was ok.
At the Freezing Lake Café...
11 hours ago
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4 comments:
I also expanded my eharmony area to include a lot of states besides Florida. Why not, right? This woman from the Circle met the man of her dreams but he was in Sarasota. Might as well give it a try!
This book sounds excellent. Some new ideas and tactics and such. Too bad they don't have a brief (cheaper) 1 time class. they'd still make $!
Is there a Cliff Notes version?
Hey! Thanks for blogging about us. I was just Googling and I found your post.
I'm glad you got so much out of the orientation and book... we are all about empowering women in the area of dating and relationships - in the Circle and out.
To respond to a couple of things:
We do offer a 1-day workshop and just held one on Nov. 7. We don't have another one scheduled at the moment, but we will definitely have more of them. (You can join us on meetups.com to be notified of future events.)
And... the woman who met her guy from Sarasota... they are getting married in January! This will be our second Surrendered Singles Circle wedding. The first was this past October. We are just completing the 3rd Surrendered Singles Circle workshop and since it's inception, we have had 45+ women participate, resulting in (so far)(the circle's not over yet!) 4 engagements, 1-wedding and 15+ committed relationships.
The book is excellent and it makes a difference for women everywhere... and the workshop takes it to another level. In the workshop you not only learn the principles, but you have relationship coaches and group discussion and feedback to iron out the details of what works and what doesn't when it comes to YOUR life. We also have social events, profile coaching, image consultants and more.
We had a great event last night - our Male Panel in which we bring in 6 gentlemen: 2 single, 2 engaged and 2 married and they answer questions from the women in the Circle about everything from dating and marriage to money and sex. No topic off limits and the answers are candid and honest. It's VERY eye-opening.
As you already got so much from the orientation and book, I can imagine what you would get out of the workshop would be significant. And as far as $200 goes, the price will go up for the next Circle... and it's worth every penny. YOU are worth every penny.
It's also worth noting that besides innumerable dating and relationship benefits; a deepened sense of confidence, ease and self-worth reported; the number-one reported benefit by the women in the Circle is breakthroughs in the areas of career, work and money... think about it - the work world - and the world in general for that matter - is full of men. If you start relating to them differently, it makes sense that things in that, and many other areas, will change.
So, yes, it costs money to take the course - we put a lot of time energy and effort into producing it...and it's worth it. You just might be surprised at your results.
For more information and to be kept posted on the Surrendered Singles Circle upcoming events, search for and join us on meetups.com.
Thanks again for posting about us! Please feel free to join us at a future Circle, and I hope to read about you in a fantastic relationship with a great guy some time soon!
Brandi Baldwin, founder and coach
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